If you live long enough, you'll soon realize that life is full of irony. In this instance, recently, I saw a job ad for a Parenting Specialist. My first thought was how perfect a job for someone who has raised children to adulthood to mentor parents just starting the journey.
Unfortunately, this life-changing experience comes with zero instructions; in spite of being more difficult, and far more important than a thousand-pegged piece of IKEA furniture. For sure, if you are a new, or soon-to-be parent, you will have a question or two on what to do and how. Yes, there are books you can read; but, that can't replace having a human voice at 3 a.m. to give you a reassuring answer.
If I may share two things you should ALWAYS exercise in your role as parent: Allow this wonderful bundle to strengthen your patience, and secondly, make you a more positively-disciplined individual who applies the rule of doing what you should to make this little person, and all-too-soon adult leaving for college, the most emotionally-healthy individual he or she can be.
This brings me to a video that blasted across TV screens worldwide a few days ago. I'm speaking of the one where the mother of six children burst on the scene in full-attack mode against her 16-year-old son who was caught in the act of violently throwing rocks at police officers. Immediately, I thought of the opportunity to work with parents of youngsters, ages 0-5 years; and, what a ministry it would be to help young parents get an early start. Grant it, most people don't think these years are as challenging as the teenage years, except, for those who have parented past this point, and know there are difficult challenges at every phase.
Back to the out-of-control mother flailing on her son in the streets of Baltimore. This was a prime opportunity for a Parenting Specialist to share what not to do as a parent, ever. Sadly, this mother was out of control. As with most people unable to channel their anger constructively, she tried in later interviews to justify her actions. But parents, draw near. Hear this. The actions of this mother is a clear example of what repeating the cycle of domestic-violence looks like. It is a clear example, also, of why the cycle of child-abuse repeats itself generation after generation UNTIL someone is blessed to say, The line-in-the-sand starts here. Choosing to not pummel a child; but, instead learn anger-management skills, and ways to discipline without abusing would be in the best interest of everyone involved in this life-changing event. The way the parent bolted into this youngster makes it so clear why teachers' patient requests for children to follow the rules, fall on deaf-ears of some learners who act out.
I was genuinely shocked that Americans thought this woman was a hero. I expected her to be arrested for domestic violence. Long-story short, becoming a parent is a fresh opportunity to make right everything wrong that affected one's childhood. However, too often, it becomes a mimicking of a destructive cycle to the well-being of the helpless creatures. For this reason, a law should require every new parent to have a lay-person or professional train them in parenting skills for six weeks. People who've weathered these years and know how difficult they can sometimes be, should mentor up. Consider starting a parenting group in your church for the various age groups, especially ages 0-5 and 12-16. Unfortunately, child-abuse victims get little airtime, barring a death, or missing child. I think parenting classes should be a mandatory course in high-schools. Students would be far-better served knowing how difficult parenting is, than, say, maybe Trigonometry? Just saying.
Blessings, all! Blessings.
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